Blissfully Insane http://blissfullyinsane.com Thoughts and wanderings of a dreamy 20 something posterous.com Sun, 12 Feb 2012 22:44:00 -0800 Kid Yummy: Eggless Oreo Cookie Cupcakes! http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-oreo-cookie-cupcakes http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-oreo-cookie-cupcakes

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My pre-teen neice came to spend the weekend with me and her only request was that we bake something together. I rememebered a cake I used to make years ago with Oreos and chocolate and thought it was time to try a new version. And so it came about, a batch of Oreo cookie cupcakes AND a 6" Oreo cookie cake. 

I experimented with my basic cupcake recipe and found that the chocolate cake was significantly more moist. I'm looking forward to adapting this to other cakes and flavors.

Oreo Cookie Cupcakes
Makes 24 cupcakes

For the cupcakes
1 + 1/4 c all purpose flour
1 c sugar
3/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 c cocoa
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 c canola or vegetable oil
1 c buttermilk
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
2 tsp vanilla extract

1/4 c water
8 Oreo cookies, crushed

For the frosting

2 sticks or 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
2 cups powdered sugar, sifted
20 - 30 Oreo cookies, finely ground
2 tsp vanilla extract
4 tbsp cold heavy whipping cream

A few mini Oreos for the garnish

Directions
Make the cupcakes!
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
2. In a bowl, sift and mix the flour, cocoa, salt and baking soda.
3. In a separate bowl, add the vinegar to the buttermilk and let stand for a few minutes. Add to it the vanila, oil and sugar. Beat thoroughly.
4. Put the Oreo cookies in a Ziploc bag and beat or club it with a rolling pin. The cookies should not be finely crumbled. You want to be able to bite into them when you eat the cake ;)
5. Fold the Oreo cookies in the flour mix and then fold the dry ingredients into the liquid mix. Do not overmix.
6. Pour into a lined cupcake pan and bake for 15 minutes or until a knife through the cupcake comes out clean.

Make the cookie frosting!
1. Finely ground the Oreo cookies. Make sure there are no cookie chunks (this will make frosting the cake a nightmare!) left in.
2.  On a low speed, beat the softened butter.
3. Add the sifted powdered sugar a bit at a time and increase the speed to make a fluffy frosting.
4. Add the vanilla, heavy whipping cream and ground cookies and beat at a medium - high speed.
(I'd add the sugar and the cookies a bit at a time till you find the right sweetness for you!)
5. Chill for about 10-15 minutes before piping onto your cupcakes. Top with a mini Oreo. 

While I loved this cake/cupcake, I do believe it's perfect for kids' birthday cakes. I did have a hard time with the frosting though, because I didn't mind the size of the oreo crumbs and even a few slightly big chunks clogged up the icing tip :(. It was the hardest and messiest part of this cake but the moment I took some of those chunks out and used a bigger decorating tip, the frosting became a lot easier. 

Oreocake4


I made about 12 cupcakes and baked a 6" cake with the remaining batter. For the cake, increase the baking time to about 25 minutes. I also scoured through my cake supplies and found a bag of mini Twix bars that we used to decorate the cake. We took the cake to my sister's for dinner and I loved looking at my 2.5 year old neice first eat the cookies, then lick the frosting and dive into the Twix bars before she stuff a lot of cake in her mouth. She decided it was yummy enough for me to deserve a hug :) If I ever needed a reason to bake, hugs from a super adorable 2 year old would be it!

And my preteen neice has spent a lot of time on video chat showing off the efforts of her labor, and making her friends feel perfectly jealous. So all in all, this weekend was as much fun as eating Oreos and milk!

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Sun, 22 Jan 2012 21:36:00 -0800 Angry Birds Cake - Moulded with Marzipan http://blissfullyinsane.com/angry-birds-cake-moulded-with-marzipan http://blissfullyinsane.com/angry-birds-cake-moulded-with-marzipan

I am deeply passionate about food. I believe food is an experience that is both, individual and communal. It's communal because the best conversations take place over food and wine. It's individual, because it engages four of your five major senses: taste, smell, touch and sight. 

The way a dish looks, should create an anticipation of what is to follow. In the mind of the eater, it should create an expectation of texture, flavor, and satisfaction. And that is what makes the baker, the ultimate artist.

Up until today, most of my posts have been focused on taste, smell and touch. But this is a cake, I baked sometime last year for my cousin's birthday. It was a red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting. But my cousin loves marzipan. So, I made a themed birthday cake with marzipan. And what better theme than Angry Birds!

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I don't have an instructional video on this, but I do have a few tips on working with marzipan:

1. Keep your hands greased and ensure the marzipan doesn't touch water - that will make it sticky
2. When rolling marzipan onto a cake, it's a good idea to dust your rolling pin with powdered sugar and to roll it out on parchment or wax paper
3. Keep a knife dipped in hot water, and wipe it dry before trimming any rolled marzipan
4. I used liquid colors when working with marzipan for this cake, and it gave a deeper, richer color

Remember that you can use other candy to help with the decoration too. Depending on what you're using, you can stick it to the marzipan by simply first moistening it with water. 

I prefer modelling with marzipan than with fondant, mainly because my personal philosophy is that everything on a cake should be delicious. And fondant, is not delicious. Marzipan does get a little expensive to work with though, and not everybody likes it. I believe modelling chocolate is a good alternative too and it's not too expensive - so, I'm looking forward to working with it in the future!

 

 

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Sat, 21 Jan 2012 17:40:00 -0800 Eggless Chocolate Cupcakes with Caramel Buttercream http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-chocolate-cupcakes-with-caramel-butte http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-chocolate-cupcakes-with-caramel-butte

It's a curious fact that I, who love chocolates, can't stand to have plain milk chocolate. Give me milk chocolate on a waffer, biscuit, with fruits in it and I'll have it. But my favorite accompaniment to milk chocolate, is caramel. I love how caramel is sweet and creamy and nutty at the same time. Naturally, then I had to make a chocolate cupcake with caramel buttercream.

I didn't grow up eating buttercream. It really is icing I've discovered only after moving to the US. That might explain why I'm not it's biggest fan. Next time I'll try this icing with whipped cream and see if my palate likes that better. But as far as buttercream goes, this recipe from 52 Kitchen Adventures is pretty awesome. 

I switched the chocolate cupcake recipe around a bit and loved the new flavor brown sugar gave it. I also had some chocolate shavings left over that I added to the recipe that added some richness to the cake.

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Ingredients:

Eggless Chocolate Cupcakes
Makes 9

3/4 cup all purpose flour
2 tbsp unsweetened cocoa
2 tbsp sweetened cocoa
1/2 cup + 2 tbsp light brown sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tbsp chocolate shavings (optional)
1/2 cup milk
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 tsp vanilla
1/8 cup oil
1/8 cup + 2tbsp water


Caramel Filling

1/2 cup sugar
3 tbsp salted butter, cubed
1/4 cup + 1 tbsp heavy whipping cream
pinch of salt

Caramel Buttercream

1/4 cup sugar
2 tbsp water
1/4 cup heavy whipping cream
1 tsp vanilla
1 stick (8 tbsp) salted butter
1 stick (8 tbsp) unsalted butter
1.5 cups powdered sugar, sifted
pinch of salt

Directions
Chocolate cupcakes:
1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F. Line a cupcake pan with 9 cupcake liners.
2. Add the apple cider vinegar to the milk and let it curdle for a few minutes.
3. Add the oil, water, light brown sugar to the liquid mix and beat.
4. Sift the baking soda, flour, cocoas together. Mix in the chocolate shavings.
5. Lightly whisk the dry ingredients and the liquid mix together.
6. Pour into the liners 2/3rds of the way and bake for 25 minutes or until a knife through the cake comes out clean
7. Take the cupcakes out of the oven and cool.

Caramel Filling
1. Evenly spread the sugar at the base of a heavy bottomed stainless steel pan. Keep it at medium heat.
2. Stir until the sugar caramelizes and turns a deep amber color.
3. Take the pan off the stove and add in the butter and whipping cream. It whill bubble and splutter. Be careful!
4. Whisk until the caramel mix is nice and smooth. If you're seeing sticky clumps for the most part, just return the pan to the stove and keep stirring until the caramel mix is smooth. Be careful not to burn it!

Caramel Buttercream
1. When caramel is made by first dissolving sugar in water, the most important thing to be mindful of is to not stir the mix.
2. In a stainless steel pan, first evenly spread the sugar and pour the water over it. Mix and ensure that the sugar is evenly laid in the pan.
3. Heat the mix on medium. DO NOT STIR. Let the mix to turn to a deep amber color.
4. Take it off the stove and mix in the whipping cream, vanilla and salt. Let the mix cool.
5. Beat the softened butter. Gradually add in the sifted powdered sugar and beat on high speed until the buttercream is light and fluffy. 
6. Fold in the caramel and mix in the buttercream. If it's too liquidy, just pop it in the fridge for 10 minutes or so.

Assembling the cupcakes:
1. Cut a circle in the middle of the cupcakes and fill in with a spoonful of the caramel filling. Close the cupcake back up with the piece you'd scooped out.
2. You'll have some caramel left over when you're done. In a piping bag, add a couple of spoons to one side of the bag. Add the buttercream on the other side and then, pipe the buttercream on the cupcake. 
3. Sprinkle some salt on the cream if you like it salty.

 

 

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Sun, 08 Jan 2012 23:07:00 -0800 Happy Birthday to Me: Eggless Chocolate Raspberry Cake http://blissfullyinsane.com/happy-birthday-to-me-eggless-chocolate-raspbe http://blissfullyinsane.com/happy-birthday-to-me-eggless-chocolate-raspbe

The best birthday present I could give myself is a day of baking. My cousin and I were celebrating our birthdays together and I wanted to make passionfruit chocolate cake, except I actually couldn't find any passionfruit pulp. There I was, standing in Safeway, wondering what I was going to do, when I spotted them - delicious and delectable raspberries! Earlier in the day, I'd picked up some melt-in-your-mouth truffles from Whole Foods. I knew then, I had to try a chocolate raspberry cake!

But since this was my birthday cake, I had to try something fancy - like chocolate shavings and a three layer cake - my first  and something that was definitely not easy to do! 

This is what I cut today:

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And this is what it looked like when I cut it:

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All in all, it was delicious and it looked pretty. It was a messy first attempt though and took a lot of time cleaning up - but, the end result was worth it. A sweet way to start 28! 

Following the many requests I've received, here's the recipe:

Ingredients

Chocolate Cake

1.5 cups all purpose flour
3/4 cup cocoa
1.5 cups sugar
1.5 cups milk
1+1/8 tsp baking soda
3 tbsp apple cider vinegar
3 tsp vanilla
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup oil
1/4 cup water

Raspberry Filling 

10.5 oz raspberries
2 oz water
1 cup sugar
1 tbsp cornflour + 1/4 cup water
1 tsp agar agar
1 tsp lemon juice
pinch of salt
1 cup heavy whipping cream
4 - 5 tbsp raspberry preserve 


Chocolate ganace

9 oz semi sweet chocolate chips
1 cup heavy whipping cream 
2 tbsp sugar

Garnish

1 cup chocolate shavings for garnish
1/2 tbsp cocoa powder
Raspberries
Chocolate truffles

Directions

Make the Cake 
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F
2. Grease and dust a 9" baking pan
3. Mix the vinegar with the milk and leave aside for a few minutes. Then add the vanilla, oil, water and sugar. Beat the liquid mix.
4. Sift together the flour, cocoa and baking soda. Mix in the liquid ingredients. Be careful not to overbeat.
5. Pour into greased pan and bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes. Then lower the temperature to 300 degrees and bake for another 30 minutes or until a knife through the cake comes out clean. Cool in the oven for 5 minutes and then set aside.

The Raspberry Filling
This can be made the day before 

1. On medium heat, cook the raspberries, sugar and water. Stir occasionally to ensure it doesn't burn.
2. Once the raspberries melt into the mix,  add the agar agar. As soon as the mix boils, cook it at low heat.
3. Mix the cornflour in water to make a smooth mix. Gradually add it to the raspberry sauce. The mixture should begin to thicken. Keep stirring at low temperature for about 5 -7 minutes. Add the lemon juice and salt. Take off the gas and cool. Your sauce should have the consistency of beaten fruit preserve.
4. Whip the cream till soft peaks form. Then add the strawberry syrup and beat again. 
5. Cool for at least an hour in the fridge. Best cooled overnight.

Chocolate ganache
This too can be made ahead of time 

1. Mix the sugar in the whipping cream and bring to a simmer on the gas.
2. Pour over the chocolate and set aside for a few minutes
3. Mix the chocolate into the whipping cream and cool. Then refrigerate.

Assembling the cake

1. Before assembling, leave the ganache out till it reaches the right spreadable consistency.
2. Cut your cake into three layers. 
3. Beat the strawberry preserve and spread on the layers you'll be filling with a pastry brush.
4. Pipe the layers with some chocolate ganache along the edges. Fill in with raspberry filling.
5. Set the layers atop of one another
6. Spread the chocolate ganache on top and along the sides.
7. Press the chocolate shavings along the sides and use a seive to spread cocoa over the top.
8. Decorate with raspberries and chocolate truffles
9. Refrigerate the cake for at least 8 hours before serving.

Note: You'll have filling and ganache left over - these can be frozen for future use. The hardest part of putting this cake together, was sticking the chocolate shavings and then lifting the cake onto the cake plate. When assembling the cake, best to do so on a flat plate with parchment paper. Use a heavy duty and big cake lifter to transfer the cake. Another option is to cool the cake for a bit before transfering it. A simple variation of this cake would be to make a 2 layer cake instead of a 3 layer one. 

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Mon, 02 Jan 2012 15:13:00 -0800 New Year Breakfast Treat: Eggless Pancakes with Caramelized Oranges http://blissfullyinsane.com/new-year-breakfast-treat-eggless-pancakes-wit http://blissfullyinsane.com/new-year-breakfast-treat-eggless-pancakes-wit

Pancakes_with_caramelized_oranges_1

The thing I begrudge hangovers the most, is how they leave this horrible taste at the back of your mouth that pretty much ensures you don't want to eat anything delicious. Then again, when you decide to hit Park Chow in Richmond and see their lovely brunch menu, you begrudge your hangover the mimosa you're too dehydrated to drink and you begrudge the menu lovely lemon ricotta pancakes you can't eat 'cause they're made with eggs!

Needless to say, when I woke up this morning, I had a big craving for lemon ricotta pancakes.  A peek in my fridge revealed that I was out of both, ricotta cheese and pancake mix. A little digging on the web and a little experimentation yielded beautiful and fluffy pancakes made from scratch. And since I ran out of maple syrup, I figured I could do this with caramelized oranges and boozy caramel sauce instead!

Ingredients

For the pancakes
Makes 8 - 10 

1 cup flour
 3 tsp baking powder
1 tbsp sugar
1/8 tsp salt
3 level tbsp plain yogurt
1 cup warm water
3 tsp oil
1/4 tsp butter
1/2 tsp powdered sugar  

For the caramelized oranges
Makes enough for one plate of pancakes

1/2 cup white cane sugar
1/8 cup water
1 tbsp light corn syrup (it's okay if you don't have this)
1 tsp butter
1/8 tsp salt
1/2 tsp lemon juice
2 tbsp cointreau/orange liquor or orange juice
dash of cinnamon (optional)
1 orange, peeled and sliced
A few thin strips of orange peel, twisted

Directions

Start by making the caramelized oranges

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1. On a low flame (3 on your electric stove), in a thick bottomed stainless steel pan, thoroughly mix the sugar, water and corn syrup until dissolved
2. Then, without stirring, let the syrup caramelize till it is a deep amber color. DO NOT STIR. If your pan is heating unevenly and you see one side of your syrup turning darker than the other, gently swirl the syrup and turn your pan until the syrup is evenly colored. Keep the gas mark low.
3. As soon as the syrup turns a deep amber, remove it from the flame. Be careful not to burn it by overheating
4. Add the butter, cointreau (or orange juice), lemon juice, salt and cinnamon. It will sputter, so be careful
5. If your caramel starts hardening, place it back on the stove and stir until it liquifies
6. Put your sliced oranges and twisted orange peel in this mix and drench with the syrup. Leave it on the stove for about two minutes and then take the pan off the stove and set aside

Now, make the pancakes

Plainpancakes

1. Mix the flour, sugar, salt and baking powder thoroughly
2. Add the water, oil, yogurt and whisk the mixture thoroughly until you see air bubbles
3. Heat a flat pan and grease it with butter/oil
4. Lower your gas flame (stove mark 3) and pour the pancake mixture a quarter cup (or less) at a time
5. Bubbles will form on the top of the poured mixture. Once dry, flip over. When golden on both sides, you can take it off.

Wipe your pan with a paper towel before making the next pancake.

Assembling the pancakes

1. Place three pancakes on top of each other
2. Place 1/4 tsp of butter on the warm pancake on top
3. Pick the oranges out of the caramel sauce and place on your pancakes
4. Spoon some of the caramel sauce (heat it if it has solidified) onto the pancakes
5. Garnish with the orange peels and sprinkle powdered sugar through a seive

You could just as easily caramelize strawberries for your pancake or serve these caramelized fruits with cream as a dessert. 

Eaten_pancakes

This was DELICIOUS. A nice rich brunch to kickstart your cooking new year with. Although, you might want to switch out the mimosa for a pomegranate bellini :) 

 

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Sun, 20 Nov 2011 10:26:00 -0800 Recipe: Rich Chocolate Cake covered in Chantilly Cream, filled with White Chocolate Whipped Cream and Strawberries http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-rich-chocolate-cake-covered-in-chantil http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-rich-chocolate-cake-covered-in-chantil

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I love birthdays and holidays. Mainly because they present me with opportunities to bake. Last year, one of my birthday presents to myself, was this rich chocolate cake. It seemed like such an ambitious project then! 

Yesterday, a friend of mine came over and we made this cake again for a Thanksgiving party she was attending. I think she too was surprised at how easy it was to make, and yet, how satisfying it was to bite into.

Ingredients

For the cake

2 cups all purpose flour
1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 cups sugar
2 cups milk
1 cup canola or vegetable oil
1.5 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
4 tbsp apple cider vinegar (or white vinegar)
2 tbsp kahlua or chocolate liquor (optional)
1 tbsp oil + 1 tbsp flour for greasing and dusting
4 tsp vanilla extract

For the Chantilly cream

1.5 cups heavy whipping cream
3 tbsp powdered sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract

For the white chocolate whipped cream

6 oz. white chocolate chips
1.5 cups heavy cream, refrigerated
1 tbsp cointreau or brandy (optional) 

1 box strawberries 

Directions

Start with making the white chocolate whipped cream:

1. In a double boiler, melt the chocolate chips
2. In a separate pan, bring 1/2 cup of the cream to a boil (be careful not to boil it too much - just let it bubble and take it off the stove)
3. When the chocolate chips are just about melting, pour the hot cream and let sit for a few minutes
4. Add in the liquor and create a smooth liquidy mix
5. Cool to room temperature
6. Whip the remaining the cream at medium speed. Just as peaks start forming, fold in the white chocolate mix. Increase to high speed and whip till stiff peaks form. Refrigerate for at least a couple of hours before using.

Make the Chantilly cream:

1. Mix the ingredients together in a bowl and whip until stiff peaks form
2. Refrigerate 

Then you make the cake:

1. Dust and grease two 8" pans or one 12" pan
2. Set the overn temperature to 350 degrees F.
3. In a bowl, mix the vinegar in the milk and leave aside to thicken
4. In another bowl, sift together the flour, cocoa, salt, sugar, baking soda and lightly mix
5. Add oil, vanilla extract to the milk and mix
6. Fold the liquid contents into the dry ingredients until just mixed. Add the kahlua. Be careful not to over mix - this may cause the cake to crack
7. Pour the mixure into your pans or pan
8. Bake in the oven for 25 minutes at 350 degrees, Lower the temperature to 325 degrees and bake for another 20 minutes or until a knife poked through the center comes out clean
9. Remove from the oven and cool for at least twenty minutes on a cooling rack 

While the cake is baking, finely slice the strawberries. In a separate bowl, take a few of the strawberry slices aside to garnish the cake with and sprinkle with powdered sugar.

Assembling the cake

1. If you baked two cakes, level the tops with a serrated knife. If you baked one 12" cake, slice it in half. Note: Make sure your cake has completely cooled before slicing it.
2. On one layer (or one cake), spread the white chocolate whipped cream
3. Layer the strawberries on top of the white chocolate cream 
4. Place the second layer of cake (or whole cake) on top
5. Frost with the chantilly cream
6. Garnish with the remaining sliced strawberries. The powdered sugar should have formed a shiny glaze on them.
7. Chill for a couple of hours before serving the cake 

 

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Tue, 11 Oct 2011 23:13:00 -0700 Pineapple-Berry: Eggless Upside Down Pineapple & Strawberry Cake http://blissfullyinsane.com/pineapple-berry-eggless-upside-down-pineapple http://blissfullyinsane.com/pineapple-berry-eggless-upside-down-pineapple

Pineapples

When I moved to the US three years back, I was most excited about two things:
a) Fruit flavored yogurt
b) Strawberries available all around the year

I first had a pineapple upside down cake almost a decade ago, while visiting a friend. I still remember liking it, but wishing it had a little kick to it. So, when I found a box of frozen strawberry sauce while cleaning my freezer the other day, I was immediately inspired to combine the sweetness of tinned pineapples with the slightly sour kick of strawberries in this Pineapple Berry Upside Down Cake.

This cake was a big hit over dinner today. My cousin couldn't believe it was made without eggs, and while she had initially planned to go for a small bite, she ended up saving a lot of the cake for the next day as well. 

Yummy_pineapple_cake

This is a moist and flavorful cake that works equally well as a tea-time cake as it does as a fruity dessert, served by itself or with a dollop of icecream. 

Ingredients

1.5 cups all purpose flour
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup canola/vegetable oil
1 strawberry sauce (recipe below) 
1 tin pineapple rings
1 tsp vanilla essence
1 tsp lemon essence
1 tsp apple cider vinegar

For the Strawberry Sauce

Strawberry_sauce

Disclaimer: I made this sauce a couple of months back and did not save the exact measurement of ingredients. Hence I will use approximations in this recipe. I recommend that you trust your tastebuds on this one - the sauce should be sweet, but sour.

2 - 3 cups chopped strawberries
1/2 cup powdered sugar
Juice of 1 lemon

Directions

Strawberry Sauce

In a heavy bottom pan, mix all ingredients and heat on low - medium settings until the mix thickens. If required, blend using a hand mixer. Cool. Adjust sweetness or sourness based on your taste preferences. For the pineapple berry cake, keep it slightly lemony.

Pineapple Berry Upside Down Cake

  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
  2. Line an 6" pan with parchment paper.
  3. Arrange pineapple rings on the bottom of the pan. Cut some of the rings in half and arrange along the sides of the pan.
  4. Spoon in strawberry sauce in the center of each of the pineapple rings on the bottom of the pan.
  5. In a big bowl, sift together flour, salt and baking soda
  6. In another bowl, mix the sugar with 1/2 cup oil, 3/4 cup of the strawberry sauce, 1/2 cup of pineapple juice from the tin, apple cider vinegar and the vanilla and lemon extracts. 
  7. Fold in the liquid mix into the flour mix gently in thirds. Do not overmix as this will cause the cake to crack.
  8. Pour your mix into the pan and bake for 30 minutes. If a knife then inserted doesn't come out clean, lower oven temperature to 300 degrees F and bake for another 10 minutes.
  9. Cool in the oven for about 5 - 7 minutes afterwards. Remove from the oven and cool for 5 minutes in the baking pan. Then invert pan onto a cake rack and peel off the parchment paper. If the strawberry sauce has stuck to the parchment paper, spoon it out and replace in the center of the pineapple rings.

Pineapple_upside_down_cake

This cake is a pleasant mix of pineapple and strawberries. If you'd like a stronger pineapple flavor, chop in a few pineapple pieces and add to your mix. If you don't have lemon extract, replace with 1/2 tsp vanilla extract + 1/2 tsp raspberry or strawberry extract, or 1 tsp vanilla extract.

 

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Mon, 03 Oct 2011 12:12:00 -0700 Vegan Orange Cupcakes with Orange Creamcheese frosting http://blissfullyinsane.com/vegan-orange-cupcakes-with-orange-creamcheese http://blissfullyinsane.com/vegan-orange-cupcakes-with-orange-creamcheese

Orange_cupcakes

Growing up, I used to love running home from the playground to freshly squeezed orange juice, lovingly served by my Mom. Even today, take me to Jamba Juice and my first instinct will be to reach out for that medium sized fresh orange juice glass!

I love the flavor of oranges. It's instantly refreshing and yet exotic when paired with ingredients like coffee or chocolate. I've spent a fair amount of time making orange flavored coffee for friends and even orange chocolate cakes.

This past week though, I decided to make a batch of cupcakes that are through and through, orange flavored. No whiff of chocolate, no after effects from caffeine. What I pleasantly discovered, was that this was a batch of absolutely no-fuss cupcakes! Super easy to make, and citrus on the tongue.

Ingredients:

Makes 12 cupcakes

1.5 cups all purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1 cup fresh orange juice
3/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1 tsp vailla extract
1 tsp orange extract
2.5 tbsp grated orange rind
1/2 cup canola/vegetable oil

For the frosting:

8 oz cream cheese
1 stick (8 tbsp butter)
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup sifted powdered sugar (more if you like your creamcheese sweet)
1 tbsp grated orange rind

Directions:
1. Pre-heat your oven to 350 F. Line 12 cup muffin pan with cupcake liners.
2. In a bowl, sift together the flour, sugar, baking soda, salt.
3. Add in the extracts, oil, orange juice and mix until no lumps remain, no more than 1 minute. Do not whisk.
4. Pour into cup cake liners, 2/3rds of the way and bake for 15 - 20 minutes or until a knife through the center of the cake comes out clean.
5. Turn off the oven and let the cupcakes cool in there for 5 - 10 minutes.
6. Take the tray out and let the cupcakes cool in the tray for 10 minutes. Then transfer on to a cake rack and cool for at least 30 minutes before frosting.

Dsc00348
 

The Frosting

1. Beat cream cheese, butter and vanilla until smooth.
2. Add sugar on low speed, beat until incorporated.
3. Add in the grated orange rind, increase the beater speed to high and mix until light and fluffy.
4. Pipe onto your cupcakes. Garnish with twisted orange rind or orange slices. 

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Sun, 25 Sep 2011 19:45:18 -0700 Eggless Mini Chocolate Eclairs - Memories from my Childhood http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-mini-chocolate-eclairs-memories-from http://blissfullyinsane.com/eggless-mini-chocolate-eclairs-memories-from

Chocolate-eclair
Do you remember the first time you ever ate a chocolate éclair? I do. I was about seven years old and there was a single bakery that made them in the little city I lived in. I remember the cream oozing out of the choux pastry, on which the chocolate ganache had begun to crack... I remember looking forward to visits to the bakery, reserved only for special occasions.

Needless to say, chocolate éclairs have a very special place in my heart and life. So, among the things that I knew I'd miss, when I gave up eggs, was that delectable little éclair from my childhood. 

Last night, I was watching the movie bridesmaids and the officer with a sweet tooth, mentioned cream puffs. That's when it began - my search across the web for vegan/vegetarian cream puffs and chocolate éclairs. 

The choux pastry is really the toughest part of the recipe. The original recipe I referenced was by Veganbits. I'm not 300% satisfied with the pastry, because although it inflated, tasted very well, I feel the texture could use a little improvement aka it could be softer. However, the overall effect of this pastry is so delectable, I'm not hesitating to post it.

Ingredients

Makes 12 mini-eclairs

For the choux pastry 
1 cup all purpose flour
2 tsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp butter
2 tbsp EnerG egg replacer whipped stiff with 1/3 cup of warm water
1 cup milk

For the vanilla cream
2 tbsp powdered sugar
1/4 cup whipping cream
1/4 tsp vanilla extract

For the chocolate ganache
2 oz semi-sweet or milk chocolate, chopped
A little less than 1/4 cup of whipping cream
1/2 tbsp butter

 Directions

I The Choux Pastry

Choux_pastry
1. Pre-heat the oven to 400 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
2. Stir together flour, sugar, salt, baking powder.
3. Bring milk and butter to a boil - use a heavy bottom pan and keep stirring to ensure the milk doesn't stick to the bottom.
4. Prepare the egg replacer on the side.
5. Add the flour mixture to the boiling milk mix, set the heat to low.
6. Keep stirring the flour until it folds into a ball and separates from the sides. It's best to use a thick steel spoon for this - the dough gets a little tough. Make sure you don't cook the flour for more than 3 - 5 minutes.
7. Remove the vessel from heat, and stir in the egg replacer 1/3rd of the quantity at a time. The dough will nicely form a ball.
8. Shape the dough into mini eclair sized pastry and place on the parchment paper.
9. Bake in the oven for 20 minutes. Thereafter, lower the temperature to 350 degrees, turn the baking tray around and leave in the oven for another 10 - 15 minutes. Check to make sure the choux is golden brown and isn't burning. Turn off the oven, stick a wooden spoon in the oven door and let the pastry cool in there for about 30 minutes. After that, you can turn it out on to a cooling rack. Wait another 30 minutes before filling and glazing.

Note: You need to work really fast through this recipe, which is a little challenging but do-able.  

II The Chocolate glaze

1. Bring the whipping cream and the butter to a boil
2. Pour over the chopped chocolate and set aside for about 5 minutes
3. Gently stir the chocolate with the cream to form a glossy sauce

Tip: The flavor of the chocolate will dominate the ganache. If you're stuck with semi-sweet chocolate or dark chocolate that's too bitter for your taste, simply put in some powdered sugar over the chopped chocolate before pouring the warm cream. 

III The Cream Filling

Whip the cream with the vanilla extract and sugar until stiff.

IV Assembling the Eclair

Mini-eclairs

1. Once the choux pastry has cooled down, slice the pastry with a serrated knife, but do not let the two parts separate.
2. Using a piping bag, squeeze the cream filling between the two halves of the pastry.
3. Pour the glaze (or spoon it if it's too thick), on to the pastry top.

This was delicious. And although, it won't compare with what I ate as a little kid in that bakery in small town India, it'll do just fine for now.

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Sun, 25 Sep 2011 14:59:00 -0700 Yummy Chocolate Cake in a Hurry... Baked in a Cup! http://blissfullyinsane.com/yummy-chocolate-cake-in-a-hurry-baked-in-a-cu http://blissfullyinsane.com/yummy-chocolate-cake-in-a-hurry-baked-in-a-cu

Cakeinacup
It's been a busy week for me... cooking for myself, trying new recipes out. Among the many that I did try, were fresh tortillas, rosemary and thyme bread and a traditional gujarati (indian) dish called "chauli-dhokli" which is basically long beans sauteed with coin-sized flour bread. I'd post the recipe, but this is, after all, a desert blog.

The thing with vegetarian baking, is that it's always SO time consuming! Especially for someone like me who's trying a new recipe out with more than just a little trepidation!

So, imagine my delight at finding this recipe for a 5 minute cake, baked in the microwave, that I quickly adapted into a delightful vegetarian version! (As a side note, if you love cooking, scouring the net for food blogs, you absolutely need to sign up for gojee.com - it's a delightful website for searching through recipes!)

Note: This cake is delicious and addictive. But it's best served warm, perhaps with some ice-cream if you wish. If you let it get too cold, it might become too crumbly.

Ingredients

Make it in one tea cup or a couple of bowls

3 tbsp all purpose flour
2 tbsp unsweetened cocoa
2.5 tbsp sugar (or maybe 3 if you prefer your chocolate sweet)
1/2 tsp cinammon (optional - but it does give it a lovely kick!)
1/2 tbsp plain yogurt (or vanilla) + 1/2 tbsp yogurt liquid
1/4 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp canola/vegetable oil/butter melted
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
2.5 tbsp water (or milk)

Icing sugar/cocoa/strawberries for the garnish

Directions 
Mix the dry ingredients in your cup first. Then whisk in the liquids and yogurt.
Ensure that it's full only 2/3rds of the way in your cup/bowl.
Microwave the mix for 2 minutes (at the most 3, depending on the power of your microwave)

This cake is very moist - don't let it dry out in the microwave. Think of it like a cake with some fudge sauce in it.

Enjoy! 

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Tue, 20 Sep 2011 11:24:00 -0700 Vegan Petit-Fours http://blissfullyinsane.com/vegan-petit-fours http://blissfullyinsane.com/vegan-petit-fours

For almost a decade now, it has been my dream to visit France. To visit the moulin rouge in Paris, to enjoy a glass of wine in Champagne, to feel the wandering gaze of Mona Lisa...

But most of all, to experience a gastronomical tour of delightful desserts. Now, I think that dream may go unfulfilled, as I've recently given up eggs altogether.

So, imagine my delight when I found this recipe for Petit Fours at http://veganyumyum.com !

Definitely a very ambitious project, but one I think I will try out soon, nonetheless.

http://veganyumyum.com/2008/01/petits-fours/

 

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Sun, 11 Sep 2011 14:24:00 -0700 Chocolate Ganache over Mini Eggless Dark Chocolate Bundt Cakes http://blissfullyinsane.com/chocolate-ganache-over-mini-eggless-dark-choc http://blissfullyinsane.com/chocolate-ganache-over-mini-eggless-dark-choc

Last night, I met up with some of my friends after a very long time. I've also been particularly stressed off late, and was looking forward to an opportunity to cook. The menu was a potpourri of mostly vegan dishes from across the world:

Guacamole with chips
Pasta in arabiatta sauce
Spicy cilantro rice
Black pepper sauce with vegetables and tofu
Biscuits

Along with a bottle of Resiling from V. Sattui.

Anyway, a few weeks back, I stopped by Bed Bath & Beyond and found a delightful mini-bundt cake pan from Wilton

Minifultedpan

I have been looking forward to using this pan ever since and was glad that last night's party provided an occasion to do so. I loved making these mini chocolate bundt cakes, topped with velvety dark chocolate ganache, served with vanilla ice cream on the side.

Mini-bundt_with_icecream

Ingredients:

For the mini bundt cakes:
Makes 15

1 cup all purpose flour
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 tsp baking soda
1 cup sugar (or more if you like your cakes sweet)
1 cup milk  (you can switch this with soy milk or water for a vegan version)
2 tbsp apple cider vinegar
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup vegetable or canola oil
2 tsp oil + 1 tbsp cocoa for greasing and dusting 
Finely sliced almonds to garnish 

For the chooclate ganache:
Makes enough to cover 28 cakes

I adapted this recipe from something I saw at joyofbaking.com
8 ounces semi-sweet or dark chocolate, chopped
3/4 cup heavy whipping cream
2 tbsp butter
2.5 tbsp cointreau 

Directions

Mini Bundt Cakes
1. Dust and grease each of the mini pans
Tip: The cocoa will be hard to dust by swirling the pan. Use a seive to dust the cocoa in each of the cavities.
2. Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees F.
3. Sift the cocoa in the flour along with the sugar, salt and baking soda.
4. Add the vinegar to the milk. Mix in the vanilla, oil.
5. Gently fold in the wet ingredients with the dry ingredients. Don't overmix.
6. Pour the mix into the moulds and bake for 15 - 20 minutes or until a knife through the cake comes out clean. 

Velvety Chocolate Ganache
1. In the microwave or the stove, bring the whipped cream and the butter to a boil.
2. Pour over the chopped chocolate pieces and let sit for a couple of minutes. Pick a chocolate you like to eat. Since I wanted dark cakes that weren't too sweet, I chose dark chocolate here too.
3. Gently stir the mix - try not to incorporate any air into it.
4. Add the cointreau to your ganache. You can skip this step altogether, or pick another liquor to go with it.

Once the cakes are done, let them cool in the pan for a couple of minutes. Gently knock the pan on all sides and pull the cakes out on a rack. With a brush, coat them with the ganache. Garnish with almond flakes, if desired.

Mini-bundtcake1

Serve as is or with vanilla ice-cream. 

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Sun, 24 Jul 2011 21:20:00 -0700 Recipe: Light Eggless (or Vegan) Vanilla Cupcakes with Decadent Chocolate Buttercream Frosting http://blissfullyinsane.com/light-eggless-or-vegan-vanilla-cupcakes-with http://blissfullyinsane.com/light-eggless-or-vegan-vanilla-cupcakes-with

Vanillacupcake
A friend once asked me what I would take with me if I were faced with the acopolypse. I answered,

1. My Mom, because to me she is the epitome of all the goodness and strength in the world
2. My iPad with its accessories, because I couldn't live without books, movies and some pre-loaded games
3. Some sugar

The last one intrigued him the most. "Why sugar?" Simply because if my world were coming to an end, I'd like a little sweetness to end it with.

The first time I fell in love with cupcakes, it was BEFORE I'd actually eaten one. They just looked beautiful with the colorful frosting holding the promise of bliss, tempered only with a light cake. Needless to say, I had to bake them. But of course, as is ALWAYS the struggle for me, it was hard to find vegetarian recipes that would make the cake light.I scourged the internet for recipes and found a lot of interesting facts about baking vegan/eggless cakes. Facts like eggless or vegan chocolate cakes actually became popular during the war when milk goods were expensive, and vinegar, despite its popular use as a sour and strong addition to salads, is used as a leavening agent in cakes instead of eggs (and it works like a charm!)

But the most fruitful discovery after days and hours of searching was, Chef Chloe (http://chefchloe.com).Chef Chloe's all of 23 and her vegan cupcake was the first vegan winner of Cupcake Wars! I used her recipe (with very minor tweaks) as the base for all my cupcakes. Upon stumbling (really, check of StumbleUpon's food inventory!) through some recipes for buttercream frosting, I found a great decadent buttercream frosting recipe from Savory Sweet Life (http://savorysweetlife.com) that I tweaked for my own cupcakes.

As much as I love sugar, I do believe that sugar tastes best when used in moderation. I like how, for example, using lesser sugar than the recipe called for, really brought out the taste of the cocoa powder and made the buttercream frosting extremely rich in flavor without being too sweet. For the cupcakes, too, I used a little less sugar than the original recipe called for, ensuring that the vanilla wasn't overridden by sweetness.

Ingredients:

For the cupcake (makes 6)
3/4 cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup milk (Chef Chloe recommended soy or rice milk or water, if you want to make this cake vegan)
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 tsp vanilla essence
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar (If you do not have any, you can use regular vinegar. I'd all a little more sugar and if required, essence, to compensate though)

For the buttercream frosting (makes 3 cups)
1 cup or 1/2 pound unsalted butter, softened, but not melted
3 cups sifted confectioner's (icing) sugar
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp vanilla or 1tsp vanilla + 1tsp almond essence
4 tbsp heavy whipping cream

Directions:

Cupcakes:
1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees (Farenheit) and line a cup-cake tin
2. Sift together flour, baking soda, salt, sugar in a bowl
3. In a separate bowl, whisk milk, vinegar, oil and essence
4. Gently fold in the wet mixture into the dry mixture
5. Whisk the mixture and pour into the cupcake liners, 2/3rd of the way
6. Place it in oven and bake for 15 - 20 minutes, or until a knife or toothpick inserted into the cake comes out clean

Frosting:
1. Gently cream the butter with a beater
2. Add the sifted sugar and cocoa and beat on a low speed till mixed
3. On a medium speed, add the salt, essences and whipping cream
4. Beat on a high speed till stiff peaks form

Frost the cupcakes with the buttercream and store in the fridge.

The result of this baking was far better than anything I had imagined. The cupcakes are extremely moist, light and fluffy (and they stay that way 2 days later too!) and the buttercream frosting has been a great hit at both parties I've served these cupcakes at. Rest assured, I will keep experimenting with this recipe with hopefully equally good results for strawberry cupcakes, peach and vanilla cupcakes, and since the Santa Rosa plums from the farmer's market are simply to die for, maybe some chocolate-plum cupcakes :)

Hope you enjoy baking these as much as I enjoyed eating them :)

 

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Tue, 05 Jul 2011 12:11:00 -0700 Paris Review - When I Look at a Strawberry, I Think of a Tongue, Édouard Levé http://blissfullyinsane.com/paris-review-when-i-look-at-a-strawberry-i-th http://blissfullyinsane.com/paris-review-when-i-look-at-a-strawberry-i-th

When I was young, I thought Life: A User’s Manual would teach me how to live and Suicide: A User’s Manual how to die. I don’t really listen to what people tell me. I forget things I don’t like. I look down dead-end streets. The end of a trip leaves me with a sad aftertaste the same as the end of a novel. I am not afraid of what comes at the end of life. I am slow to realize when someone mistreats me, it is always so surprising: evil is somehow unreal. When I sit with bare legs on vinyl, my skin doesn’t slide, it squeaks. I archive. I joke about death. I do not love myself. I do not hate myself. My rap sheet is clean. To take pictures at random goes against my nature, but since I like doing things that go against my nature, I have had to make up alibis to take pictures at random, for example, to spend three months in the United States traveling only to cities that share a name with a city in another country: Berlin, Florence, Oxford, Canton, Jericho, Stockholm, Rio, Delhi, Amsterdam, Paris, Rome, Mexico, Syracuse, Lima, Versailles, Calcutta, Bagdad. 

 

Edouard Leve, Pecheur de Bagdad et sa fille, 2002, color photograph. From

 

I would rather be bored alone than with someone else. I roam empty places and eat in deserted restaurants. I do not say “A is better than B” but “I prefer A to B.” I never stop comparing. When I am returning from a trip, the best part is not going through the airport or getting home, but the taxi ride in between: you’re still traveling, but not really. I sing badly, so I don’t sing. I had an idea for a Dream Museum. I do not believe the wisdom of the sages will be lost. I once tried to make a book-museum of vernacular writing, it reproduced handwritten messages from unknown people, classed by type: flyers about lost animals, justifications left on windshields for parking cops to avoid paying the meter, desperate pleas for witnesses, announcements of a change in management, office messages, home messages, messages to oneself. I cannot sleep beside someone who moves around, snores, breathes heavily, or steals the covers. I can sleep with my arms around someone who doesn’t move. I have attempted suicide once, I’ve been tempted four times to attempt it. The distant sound of a lawn mower in summer brings back happy childhood memories. I am bad at throwing. I have read less of the Bible than of Marcel Proust. Roberto Juarroz makes me laugh more than Andy Warhol. Jack Kerouac makes me want to live more than Charles Baudelaire. La Rochefoucauld depresses me less than Bret Easton Ellis. Joe Brainard is less affirmative than Walt Whitman. I know Jacques Roubaud less well than Georges Perec. Gherasim Luca is the most full of despair. I don’t see the connection between Alain Robbe-Grillet and Antonio Tabucchi. When I make lists of names, I dread the ones I forget. From certain angles, tanned and wearing a black shirt, I can find myself handsome. I find myself ugly more often than handsome. I like my voice after a night out or when I have a cold. I am unacquainted with hunger. I was never in the army. I have never pulled a knife on anyone. I have never used a machine gun. I have fired a revolver. I have fired a rifle. I have shot an arrow. I have netted butterflies. I have observed rabbits. I have eaten pheasants. I recognize the scent of a tiger. I have touched the dry head of a tortoise and an elephant’s hard skin. I have caught sight of a herd of wild boar in a forest in Normandy. I ride. I do not explain. I do not excuse. I do not classify. I go fast. I am drawn to the brevity of English, shorter than French. I do not name the people I talk about to someone who doesn’t know them, I use, despite the trouble of it, abstract descriptions like “that friend whose parachute got tangled up with another parachute the time he jumped.” I prefer going to bed to getting up, but I prefer living to dying. I look more closely at old photographs than contemporary ones, they are smaller, and their details are more precise. I have noticed that, on the keypads of Parisian front doors, the 1 wears out the fastest. I’m not ashamed of my family, but I do not invite them to my openings. I have often been in love. I love myself less than I have been loved. I am surprised when someone loves me. I do not consider myself handsome just because a woman thinks so. My intelligence is uneven. My amorous states resemble one another, and those of other people, more than my works resemble one another, or those of other people. I have never shared a bank account. A friend once remarked that I seem glad when guests show up at my house but also when they leave. I do not know how to interrupt an interlocutor who bores me. I have good digestion. I love summer rain. I have trouble understanding why people give stupid presents. Presents make me feel awkward, whether I am the giver or the receiver, unless they are the right ones, which is rare. Although I am self-employed, I observe the weekend. I have never kissed a lover in front of my parents. I do not have a weekend place because I do not like to open and then shut a whole lot of shutters over the course of two days. I have not hugged a male friend tight. I have not seen the dead body of a friend. I have seen the dead bodies of my grandmother and my uncle. I have not kissed a boy. I used to have sex with women my own age, but as I got older they got younger. I do not buy used shoes. I have made love on the roof of the thirtieth floor of a building in Hong Kong. I have made love in the daytime in a public garden in Hong Kong. I have made love in the toilet of the Paris–Lyon TGV. I have made love in front of some friends at the end of a very drunken dinner. I have made love in a staircase on the avenue Georges-Mandel. I have made love to a girl at a party at six in the morning, five minutes after asking, without any preamble, if she wanted to. I have made love standing up, sitting down, lying down, on my knees, stretched out on one side or the other. I have made love to one person at a time, to two, to three, to more. I have smoked hashish and opium, I have done poppers, I have snorted cocaine. I find fresh air more intoxicating than drugs. I smoked my first joint at age fourteen in Segovia, a friend and I had bought some “chocolate” from a guard in the military police, I couldn’t stop laughing and I ate the leaves of an olive tree. I smoked several joints in the bosom of my grammar school, the Collège Stanislas, at the age of fifteen. The girl whom I loved the most left me. At ten I cut my finger in a flour mill. At six I broke my nose getting hit by a car. At fifteen I skinned my hip and -elbow falling off a moped, I had decided to defy the street, riding with no hands, looking backward. I broke my thumb skiing, after flying ten meters and landing on my head, I got up and saw, as in a cartoon, circles of birthday candles turning in the air and then I fainted. I have not made love to the wife of a friend. I do not love the sound of a family on the train. I am uneasy in rooms with small windows. Sometimes I realize that what I’m in the middle of saying is boring, so I just stop talking. Art that unfolds over time gives me less pleasure than art that stops it. Even if it is an odd sort of present, I thank my father and mother for having given me life.

 

 

I believe the people who make the world are the ones who do not believe in reality, for example, for centuries, the Christians. There are times in my life when I overuse the phrase “it all sounds pretty complicated.” I wonder how the obese make love. Not wanting to change things does not mean I am conservative, I like for things to change, just not having to do it. I connect easily with women, it takes longer with men. My best male friends have something feminine about them. I ride a motorcycle but I don’t have the “biker spirit.” I am an egoist despite myself, I cannot even conceive of being altruistic. Until the age of twelve I thought I was gifted with the power to shape the future, but this power was a crushing burden, it manifested itself in the form of threats, I had to take just so many steps before I got to the end of the sidewalk or else my parents would die in a car accident, I had to close the door thinking of some favorable outcome, for example passing a test, or else I’d fail, I had to turn off the light not thinking about my mother getting raped, or that would happen, one day I couldn’t stand having to close the door a hundred times before I could think of something good, or to spend fifteen minutes turning off the light the right way, I decided enough was enough, the world could fall apart, I didn’t want to spend my life saving other people, that night I went to bed sure the next day would bring the apocalypse, nothing happened, I was relieved but a little bit disappointed to discover I had no power. 

 

Edouard Leve, Entree de Rio, 2002, color photograph. From

 

In a sandwich, I don’t see what I am eating, I imagine it. Even very tired, I can watch TV for several hours. As a child I dreamed of being not a fireman, but a veterinarian, the idea was not my own, I was imitating my cousin. I played house with a cousin, but there were variants, it could be doctor (formal inspection of genitals), or thug and bourgeoise (mini–rape scene), when we played thug and bourgeoise my cousin would walk past the swing set where I’d be sitting, outside our family’s house, I would call out to her in a menacing tone of voice, she wouldn’t answer but would act afraid, she would start to run away, I would catch her and drag her into the little pool house, I would bolt the door, I’d pull the curtains, she would try vaguely to get away, I would undress her and similute the sexual act while she cried out in either horror or pleasure, I could never tell which it was supposed to be, I forget how it used to end. I would be very moved if a friend told me he loved me, even if he told me more out of love than friendship. I find certain ethnicities more beautiful than others. When I ask for directions, I am afraid I won’t be able to remember what people tell me. I am always shocked when people give me directions and they actually get me where I’m going: words become road. I like slow motion because it brings cinema close to photography. I get along well with old people. A woman’s breasts may hold my attention to the point that I can’t hear what she’s saying. I enjoy the simple decor of Protestant temples. I do not write memoirs. I do not write novels. I do not write short stories. I do not write plays. I do not write poems. I do not write mysteries. I do not write science fiction. I write fragments. I do not tell stories from things I’ve read or movies I’ve seen, I describe impressions, I make judgments. The modern man I sing. In one of my recurring nightmares, gravity is so heavy that the chubby pseudo-humans who wander the empty surface of the earth move in slow motion through an endless moonlit night. I have utterly lost touch with friends who were dear to me, without knowing why, I believe they don’t know why themselves. I learned to draw by copying pornographic photographs. I have a foggy sense of history, and of stories in general, chronology bores me. I do not suffer from the absence of those I love. I prefer desire to pleasure. My death will change nothing. I would like to write in a language not my own. I penetrate a woman faster than I pull out. If I kiss for a long time, it hurts the muscle under my tongue. I am afraid of ending up a bum. I am afraid of having my computer and negatives stolen. I cannot tell what, in me, is innate. I do not have a head for business. I have stepped on a rake and had the handle hit me in the face. I have gone to four psychiatrists, one psychologist, one psychotherapist, and five psychoanalysts. I look for the simple things I no longer see. I do not go to confession. Legs slightly open excite me more than legs wide open. I have trouble forbidding. I am not mature. When I look at a strawberry, I think of a tongue, when I lick one, of a kiss. I can see how drops of water could be torture. A burn on my tongue has a taste. My memories, good or bad, are sad the way dead things are sad. A friend can let me down but not an enemy. I ask the price before I buy. I go nowhere with my eyes closed. When I was a child I had bad taste in music. Playing sports bores me after an hour. Laughing unarouses me. Often, I wish it were tomorrow. My memory is structured like a disco ball. I wonder if there are still parents around to threaten their children with a whipping. The voice, the lyrics, and the face of Daniel Darc made French rock listenable to me. The best conversations I ever had date from adolescence, with a friend at whose place we drank cocktails that we made by mixing up his mother’s liquor at random, we would talk until sunrise in the salon of that big house where Mallarmé had once been a guest, in the course of those nights, I delivered speeches on love, politics, God, and death of which I retain not one word, even though I came up with some of them doubled over in laughter, years later, this friend told his wife that he had left something in the house just as they were leaving to play tennis, he went down to the basement and put a bullet in his head with the gun he had left there beforehand. I have memories of comets with powdery tails. I read the dictionary. I went into a glass labyrinth called the Palace of Mirrors. I wonder where the dreams go that I don’t remember. I do not know what to do with my hands when they have nothing to do. Even though it’s not for me, I turn around when someone whistles in the street. Dangerous animals do not scare me. I have seen lightning. I wish they had sleds for grown-ups. I have read more volumes one than volumes two. The date on my birth certificate is wrong. I am not sure I have any influence. I talk to my things when they’re sad. I do not know why I write. I prefer a ruin to a monument. I am calm during reunions. I have nothing against the alarm clock. Fifteen years old is the middle of my life, regardless of when I die. I believe there is an afterlife, but not an afterdeath. I do not ask “do you love me.” Only once can I say “I’m dying” without telling a lie. The best day of my life may already be behind me.

Translated from French by Lorin Stein

 

Best known as a photographer, Édouard Levé was also the author of four works of prose: Oeuvres, Journal, Autoportrait, and Suicide, the last of which he finished days before he took his own life, in 2007, at the age of forty-two. Levé wrote Autoportrait—the source of these pages—in 2002, while he was traveling across America, taking the photographs that became “Série Amérique.”

There was a part of me that understood him. A part of me, that felt he was telling my story. A part of me, that was afraid of how it would end. But most of all, a part of me, that fell in love.

Thank you, D, for sharing.

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Thu, 09 Jun 2011 22:33:00 -0700 If I Could Count My Blessings... http://blissfullyinsane.com/if-i-could-count-my-blessings http://blissfullyinsane.com/if-i-could-count-my-blessings

Dandelion_seeds_being_blown

If I could count my blessings, I'd be richer than I ever wanted to be.

There are days, when you feel like the world has dragged you down, taken your dreams, torn them apart and scattered them like the wings on little dandelions. There are days, when you feel like you've fallen into an abyss from which you think only a miracle can save you.

And then you realize, that you don't need miracles. You only need blessings... blessings that were flowing with the wind, as inconspicuously as the little dandelion seeds. And you'd know if you'd start counting them, you'd be richer than you thought you'd be in only your wildest dreams.

I've been there, in that place, huddled in a corner, tear-struck and hope-deprived. I've felt like shrivelling up like a walnut, disappearing like a black hole, shrinking to the size of a pea. I've felt angry at the world, lashed out for every time I've fallen short and wondered why the world picked on me to bully. 

And just like that, I started feeling it. The first arm around my shoulders, from my sister who promised to walk me to the light, the palm on my head, of my mother, promising me that there will always be light, the guiding hand of my brother-in-law telling me to mind the puddles and the ever shining warmth of my Dad, just keeping me away from the cold. 

And when I looked around, other faces started appearing, smiling at me, crying with me, blowing wishes to me... my oldest sister, my father-like Uncle, the sister-in-laws that have been more like sisters, the cousins that stand like pillars, the friends old and new... and these faces tell me, remind me, that I am, truly blessed. 

I know im in a pickle, but there are enough hands ready to pull me out. And that, is enough to know, that I can get by it all.

 

 

 

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Sat, 26 Feb 2011 11:19:00 -0800 Recipe: Eggless Tiramisu intoxicated with Kahlua http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-eggless-tiramisu-intoxicated-with-kahl http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-eggless-tiramisu-intoxicated-with-kahl

Tiramisu

*Sigh* If only I was a better food photographer...

I was never necessarily crazy about Tiramisu when I was in India. I was also always confused about what it was supposed to be - a pastry, a mousse, something in between? Was it supposed to be dark or was it supposed to be sweet? Wasn't it supposed to be made with chocolate with a hint of coffee?

And then I moved to New York, where the sweet little Italian delis were more than happy to serve Tiramisu along with their strong cups of cappuccino. And, I went to Cafe Dante in the Village where the only word I could use to describe the Tiramisu, is divine.

Ever since, I've been meaning to try making Tiramisu. The thing that initially held me back was that maybe it needed to be made using gelatin. And then, I held back because I didn't know what ladyfingers were. And then I held back because I didn't know what mascarpone was. What I realized, in the end, is that there will be a million things holding me back until I make up my mind to follow through on something I want to do.

Traditionally, Tiramisu is made with ladyfingers, a light and spongy Italian biscuit, strong espresso coffee, marsala wine, mascarpone cheese and raw eggs. 

Since I am a strict vegetarian, I couldn't use ladyfingers or raw eggs (Oh the gelatin thing, just a myth made in my head). So, I substituted ladyfingers with vanilla sponge cake.

For the cake:

2 cups flour + 4 tbsp flour
4 level tsp double action baking powder
1 can (400g) sweetened condensed milk
120 ml melted butter (or 8 tbsp solid butter)
4 tsp vanilla
1/4 cup Kahlua

For the cream filling:

250g Mascarpone cheese
1.5 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup heavy whipping cream, chilled
1/4 cup icing sugar
4 - 6 tbsp Kahlua

1 cup chilled espresso + 5 - 6 tbps Kahlua

Cocoa powder for dusting

I first made the espresso. I used a South-Indian decoction maker and some mild Costa Rican fair trade coffee. I would recommend using stronger coffee in the future. I've heard Starbucks VIA is a good coffee to use for the espresso. Once made, I put it in the freezer to chill it while I started working on the cake to susbstitute the ladyfingers with. Frankly, you could get away with making half a recipe of this cake. But it was absolutely delish so I just kept a lot of the cake aside for fun!

1) Preheat the oven to 400 degrees farenheit. Grease and dust a 8 x 8 baking dish.

2) Sift the flour with the baking powder. Add the sweetened condensed milk, melted butter, vanilla and Kahlua and start whisking the mix. Add warm water and keep whisking until the batter is well aired and of pouring consistency. I used an electric beater for this. Pour the batter into the pan and put it in the oven. After 15 minutes, I lowered the temperature to 325 degrees. It took about 40 minutes to bake the cake. The sure shot test to tell if the cake is done is to poke it with a knife to see if it comes out clean. Once the cake was baked, I left it to cool for almost 30 minutes on a rack.

3) I started beating the whipped cream using the whisk attachment of the beater, slowly adding icing sugar to the mix. I did this till the cream had soft peaks. Overbeating can be disastrous and so I try and be careful not to do that. (Imagine a nervous me, biting a lip and starting intently at the working bowl making sure I'm not beating it a bit too much!). Once done, I put the mix aside in the fridge.

4) I used the same whisk attachment for the beater and beat the mascarpone cheese with the vanilla and Kahlua. The consistency of the cheese should resemble that of the whipped cream. Initially, the cheese will look like it is lumping up, but don't worry about it. Once done, gently fold the whipped cream with the cheese mix and set aside in the fridge.

5) By now the cake has cooled and is ready to be sliced into pieces to line the serving dish with. First slice away the raised portion of the cake and cut off the sides of the cake (basically, take out any crisp parts of the cake that might hamper with coffee absorption). At this point, you need to decide whether you want to set your Tiramisu in glasses (which look pretty) or in a deep rectangular serving dish. This will dictate the size of the fingers you will cut from the cake. I used the rectangular deep dish as I was carrying the Tiramisu to a friend's and glasses would have been difficult to manage. In my mind, slicing the cake was also the trickiest part of making the Tiramisu because the thickness of the cake pieces is critical - it should be thick enough to absorb the coffee and Kahlua mix but not so thick that it becomes chunky to eat. I made the mistake of slicing it too thick and for the future, I will ensure I slice the cake into 1.5 cm thick fingers. Given the size of my dish, I sliced it into 1" wide thick fingers. Just ensure you have enough "fingers" to make two layers.

6) In a shallow plate, put in a few tablespoons of the espresso with an equivalent amount of Kahlua. Dip the fingers in the coffee mix and lay down in the serving dish. Do this quickly so that the cake doesn't crumble. Spread the cheese mix over this layer. Using a seive, dust this layer with the cocoa powder. Put another layer of coffee soaked cake atop of the cream mix. Spread another layer of the cream mix and dust with cocoa. And now, you're done! Just chill it overnight in the fridge.

I loved this. I wish I had made the Tiramisu sooner. It was heavy but I think the heaviness could be attributed to the thickness of the cake. 

Next time, I'm going to try dousing the cake in marsala wine or brandy instead. 

As to my original question - What is Tiramisu? It's what coffee and alcohol is meant to be, if it were to be eaten and not drunk. 

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Sun, 16 Jan 2011 21:12:00 -0800 Recipe: Brilliant, brilliant apple upside down cake http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-brilliant-brilliant-apple-upside-down http://blissfullyinsane.com/recipe-brilliant-brilliant-apple-upside-down

Apple_upside_down_cake_january_21st_2006

Disclaimer: This isn't the cake I baked. The one I did, was quickly devoured.

There was an old saying back at the advertising agency I used to work at: 
"When the going gets tough, it starts raining cakes"

What they really meant, is that when I'd get tired of working, or extremely stressed out, I'd bake. A lot. And since I possibly couldn't eat it all, I'd take it to work. Let's just say, I can really relate to Izzy Stevens in Grey's Anatomy. Nothing makes me happier than the smell of vanilla, the sheen of melting chocolate chips and licking a cake batter covered spatula. And it's a challenge every time. You see, I bake without eggs. Which basically means, I have to tweak every recipe I read and find. Which means, there's a little bit of me in every one of those cakes. And it makes me happy to know something I made, if done well, could give someone great joy, in the flavor of crisp, toasty apples, the texture of sweet whipped cream frosting and the purity of simple, delectable chocolate sponge cake.

Anyway, let's just say I've had many reasons to be stressed off late. So I gave myself a midnight challenge. Something I'd seen but never made before: Apple Upside Down Cake.

I'm not going to say it was perfect. I'll also admit I had to pick the apples from the bottom of the pan and stick them back up on the cake once made. But I can say, that on day 2, it tasted like the best damn apple cake I could've made. I'll suggest a few iterations as I go along:

Ingredients:

1 cup + 2 tbsp all-purpose flour
2 level tsp double-action baking powder
1/2 can (or 200 g) sweetened condensed milk
60 ml melted butter (usually amounts to 4 tbsp of solidified butter)
2 tsp vanilla essence
1/2 tsp cinnamon (use more or less depending on how much you love cinnamon)
1/4 tsp ground ginger ( this is mainly for the flavor: use depending on your preference. Skip it if you're not a fan)
Some nutmeg (some recipes call for using just a dash but I love nutmeg and use just a little less than I use cinnamon)
1 tsp sugar in the raw or brown sugar
1 apple, finely sliced 

Here's what I did:

1) Preheated the oven to 400 degrees F
2) Liberally greased and dusted a 6" round pan
3) Sieved the flour and baking powder. Folded into the mixture the melted margarine, vanilla essence/extract and condensed milk. Then I used a whisk to smoothen the entire mixture. You know, to that point that you can see beautiful little patterns forming in the mixture. I also added some warm water to the mix because the batter needs to be of pouring consistency. Since the cake is eggless, not adding enough water could make the cake too dense and hard. 
4) I then added the spices to taste and mixed it up again.
5) In the pan, I spread the sugar and lined the tin with the apples. Then I poured the mixture over it and put it in the oven. This cake took twice as long to cook as a regular chocolate cake using a similar recipe. It also rose a lot from the center and cracked. I'm still trying to achieve that perfection but the cake tasted so good, I feel confident recommending it any way. After 30 minutes, I reduced the oven temperature to 325 and baked till a knife put through the center came clean.
6) Once that happened, I took it out and cut the raised center with a big serrated bread cutting knife and then I inverted the tin. I think I perhaps should've waited cause all the apples didnt come through on top of the cake and I had to pull them out and them in place on the cake.
The original recipe (Which I tweaked) said the cake should have been served warm. Personally, I preferred the cake cold and can only imagine it tasting even better with cream.

I'm looking forward to making this cake again with better results. The challenge continues: next time, I'll work hard on making it bake evenly, with almost no cracks and making the apples stick. Perhaps, I'll add a little caramel to the mix, and even mix some apple sauce with the condensed milk in the batter. I could also use some fresh ginger in the mix, or caramelize the ginger with the apples at the base of the tin.

So many ideas! I'm happy just at the thought of it :) 

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Tue, 02 Nov 2010 14:02:00 -0700 I'll Run Because I Believe http://blissfullyinsane.com/ill-run-because-i-believe http://blissfullyinsane.com/ill-run-because-i-believe

This blog is two days late or well one day early, depending on how you look at it.

About a year and a half ago, a friend challenged me to run a half-marathon in under 2 hours. I took the challenge just because it was a challenge. And because I wanted something from him then. But I also took it because I grew up with the idea that I would never run. I could walk for miles and I could play some basketball. I could even skate and bike for a bit. But running, nah, was never my sport.

February 2009.
Time run:5 minutes


April 2009. I now had something to prove. I started running more regularly. Spring in NY is beautiful. Especially when you get to see the Cherry Blossoms blooming on the East banks of the Reservoir in Central Park.Around the reservoir. That's where I ran.
Time run: 22 minutes.

I continued running over summer. I bought Nike Plus and running shoes to keep tabs on my progress. And then, life happened. I forgot what it meant to keep running.

The end of the year came and went and I lost that challenge.

October 2010.
On a whim, I signed up for the US Half Marathon. Actually, I signed up 'cause I got a 50% off Groupon for it. And I managed to con my family into sponsoring me too. I was determined to train and go for it. For exactly two days.

But I had a very tough week last week and I needed to clear my head out. I needed some more faith in myself and to believe that I could achieve what I set my mind to. I needed to know that I won't leave things unfinished.

With 7 days to go to the half marathon, I started training again. I set my mind to running 3 miles and I did it in 39 minutes! And boy did it feel good!

I woke up today morning and thought I could push myself just a little more and I set my Nike Plus run to 4 miles.

I know I won't complete the Marathon in less than two hours. But it matters that I try. It matters because I thought I couldn't run for more than 5 minutes and I ran for 52 minutes this morning.

And I will finish that half-marathon in style. Because I know, I can achieve anything I set my mind to.

And I finished the half-marathon. In 3 hours and 10 minutes. I ran 8 miles and walked about 5. 

Target: April 2011: The Other Half half-marathon in Marin County. Distance run: 13.1 miles. Time: < 3 hours.

Woman-running1

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